JOB TIPS: how to nail that gig!

Are you being sucked down the economic drain?  Me too!  And it's not a nice feeling. Fortunately, living in SE Michigan has given me some perspective.  So maybe I can help you get thru these rough times and see, if not the silver lining, at least the foil wrapping.

#1 - Do not get discouraged.  Looking for a job and getting nowhere takes a big psychic toll.  I know -- I've been essentially unemployed since moving to Michigan 3 long years ago (great idea, I know) (NOT mine!).  Guesstimating, I've probably sent out 300 resumes in that time.  Most get no answer at all.  After a while, you expect not to hear back.  Much worse is when you DO hear back, or even get an interview, and it comes to nothing.  This has also happened to me a number of times. Maybe it's because I'm from from New York -- Michigan people are generally very nice, but they have this "employees should be seen and not heard" vibe that I just don't get.  Even on my best fucking behavior, I seem to offend the hell out of every prospective employer. To which I say: get over it, prospective employer.    

So it's important to keep a sense of your own worth, even in the face of constant devaluation by people who don't know you, don't get you, never will, and don't even know how hopeless they themselves are.  

Empowerment Exercise:  Stand up tall, take a deep breath, and picture the last person who interviewed you for a job you didn't get.  Now say out loud:  FUCK YOU, PROSPECTIVE EMPLOYER!  Visualize the person crumbing into a pile of dust and blowing away.  Repeat several times, then go out and take a long walk.