this is why I started this blog

You're a TV reporter.  The mayor of  your city is arraigned in court on charges of obstruction of justice, conspiracy to commit obstruction of justice, misconduct in office, and perjury (and it was cool the way the presiding judge read 'em off:  perjury - misconduct in office - misconduct in office - perjury - perjury - perjury).  It's national news.  And the top story on your channel is you, standing outside in the middle of the night in front of the district court building where this happened 12 hours earlier, talking about whether or not the mayor and his former lover/now co-defendant, will be in court together? 

Then your channel's legal analyst is on for a total of 30 seconds -- and his "analysis" concerns when the trial might start.  

Then you have Monica Conyers of the city council coming on, talking about how it's a "sad day" for the city -- doesn't say (and isn't asked, of course) why she thinks that -- seems to me it's actually a very HAPPY day for Detroit, and for the city council especially, who are finally getting Ubu Roi off their backs just a little.  I guess Ms. Conyers didn't mind having phat-ass on her back!  Fortunately, Kwame Kenyatta and Ken Cockrel still retain some of their human dignity despite years of dealing with the Hip Hop Mayor, and are saying flat out it's time for him to go.  To which the Kwamster's press secretary responds, in preachy bullshit double-speak worthy of the Bush administration -- "You cannot steal an election, you must earn it"!  (now that's news).

A related story:  In the best-ever example of closing the barn door after it's burned down, city council is looking at capping the am't of money a mayor can spend w/o council approval.  Too bad that couldn't have happened about $9 million earlier...

Then, 60 black ministers in Hamtramck getting together to support and pray for the mayor. What in the fuck ---?!   I thought ministers were supposed to "support" ethical behavior and telling the truth and not cheating on your wife and stuff like that.  This is followed by a story about a special prayer service, for no reason other than just, you know, "the city needs prayer, the city is in pain" -- but no, no, "it's not about any person" -- we just do these little freakin songs-and-dances whenever the stars line up right.  What the fuck, did all the rejects from the OJ jury end up moving to Detroit?

And why is this crap on the news, anyway!  instead of them talking about the actual case against the mayor, interviewing legal experts (of which there are plenty at the University of Michigan, for example -- but that's not IN DETROIT) or business leaders who could talk about the image/economic repercussions this could have for the city, or anybody who could put the whole thing into some kind of context or give viewers some sense of what comes next.  I mean, really:  what does come next? 

Instead of taking this opportunity to educate people about what the law is, what public service is, what the mayor has done and why it's so serious, they do this bullshit high-school gossip "reporting" that serves absolutely nobody and ultimately helps increase the insularity of the city.  And then you end up with (as follows) 5-second soundbites of 3 out of 3 middle-aged white guys, businessmen, saying it's bad for business and the mayor should go, and 3 out of 5 thirtyish black men and women expressing sympathy and support for "Suge Knight" Kilpatrick.   "To see a person of his stature in court like a common criminal!" bemoans one.  Well, yes, if you behave like a common criminal!  

And this is why the guy was re-elected in the first place, although not the only reason, I'm sure.  Because you have a populace that apparently can't tell the difference between a good public servant and one who wants to be in office so he can carouse and carry on and travel on the public's dime, and employ friends and family members, and take everything  he can possibly steal from his city's people. 

A smart and thorough local TV news dedicated to educating its viewers is a powerful counterweight to these kinds of abuses.  In many ways, it's the only counterweight, because nobody cares as much about what's happening locally as the local news reporters.  Why is it that the media is so chronically unwilling or incapable of exploiting its own potential for improving human society and doing good?

forget about being crucified in the phillipines, people

(an easter respite from the detroit news... hosanna, hey-sanna, sanna sanna ho:)

CRUCIFIXION BAD FOR YOU

[Canwest News Service, Canada / Thur. March 20, 200]

MANILA -- Health officials in the Phillipines warned the Roman Catholic faithful Wednesday that re-enacting the crucifixion could be bad for their health.

On Good Friday, dozens of people, mostly men, will be nailed to wooden crosses, while hundreds more will strip to the waist and whip themselves until their backs are cut and bloody as a way of atoning for their sins over the past year.

The department of health advised people taking part in the rituals to have a tetanus injection and to check the condition of the whip they will use before lashing their backs [advice we can all benefit from!].  It said dirty whips "welcome all sorts of infections and bacteria like tetanus."

for once it's worse somewhere else

Top story -- actually, only story:  we're getting a huge snowstorm, but Toledo's getting even more!  Supposed to have "bursts of heavy snow from time to time" until 2 a.m., then light snow till 7 a.m.  There's already about 6 inches of snow on the ground, another 2-4 due before it's all over.

Cheryl Chodun (back in the white knit hat) out by the highway (I-275 in Canton) in blizzard conditions -- fogged camera lens, halos around headlights -- reporting on spunout cars, interviewing a young driver who went into a ditch -- nobody hurt.  Tow truck driver:  "We'll be out all night" -- a bonanza for them -- no ploughs, of course (see earlier entries, below). 

Peggy Agar live on a bridge over M10 in Southfield, where absolutely nothing is happening -- "you can see there is snow down there, but we have also seen salt trucks out on the highway" -- Oakland Co. putting out salt/sand mix b/c they're low on salt.

Traffic tracker camera -- "roads appear to be wet and slushy" -- please drivers, "take it easy" (right).

Then on to the mayor scandal -- 2 top city officials (one Kwame's cousin) could face contempt charges for not cooperating with the investigation.  Monday is a big day, Wayne Co. prosecutor Kym Worthy (who has a kind of Veronica-Lake hair thing going, and a coy demeanor to match -- weird for a prosecutor) is announcing at a press conference Monday morning whether/what charges she will bring against the mayor.   Together, these stories took about 1 minute total.  Nobody interviewed for either one -- maybe the city shut down for Good Friday? 

Live pix of main street in Ferndale, a few cars going by in the blizzard.  The Death Report -- a young construction worker, and the lady in Florida who was hit in the head by a stingray (she was from Michigan).  Back to Peggy & Cheryl again, still out in the snow.  Pix from earlier today of the same storm hitting Minnesota and Chicago before it got here.  Big truck crash in MN -- no injuries.

Elsewhere in the midwest, it's flooding -- sandbags in Indiana, stranded cows in Missouri -- a house in Arkansas floating down a river, crashing into a bridge.  At least they don't have to pay their mortgage anymore!

don't call me nigger -- it's unethical

WXYZ team still with the real news:  Lead story tonight, Detroit police chief Ella Bully Cummings talking abt a police officer who claims he's been intimidated b/c of what he knows about Kwame Kilpatrick's famous party-that-didn't-happen at the Manoogian Mansion.  For once, reporter Glenda Lewis is actually seen INDOORS! interviewing EBC earlier today (you'll be glad to know she takes the charges seriously and vows an investigation.  That would be a first for Chief Friend-of-Kwame).  And don't think Glenda's getting soft just because she was inside a building!  As ever, she filed her story from the great outdoors, "live in downtown Detroit" at 11 pm, in front of (I guess) Police Headquarters -- which looked quite closed  (like why would THEY be open at night).

Then Cheryl Chodun (no hat, camel hair coat) "live outside the Manoogian Mansion" to report that MI Attorney General Mike Cox FINALLY wants to talk with the former records clerk who claims to have seen a report that the murdered dancer, Tamara Greene, was assaulted by Kwame's wife at the party-that-didn't happen.  True to the station's high technical standards, the audio of Cox was almost inaudible.  

[Cox himself is a real piece of work on this issue -- he's never seen fit to question Kwame's wife at all about the party-that-didn't-happen.]

The city council is trying again with their resolution to get Kwame to resign -- they're bringin it for a vote on Tuesday.   Hopefully this time it'll get there.  Never has a governing body been so thoroughly hoodwinked and steamrolled and just plain dissed by an executive as the poor Detroit city council by the hip-hop mayor, Kwame "Suge" Kilpatrick.  Who used his State of the City message Tuesday to rant that HE was the REAL victim in the whole text message and perjury scandal!!  As quoted in this week's Newsweek:  "In the past 30 days I've been called a nigger more than any time in my entire life ... This unethical, illegal lynch-mob mentality has to stop."  The words unmitigated gall come to mind...   Mind you, this is same asshole who held a mock funeral for the so-called N-word last year.

But at least WXYZ is acting like journalists for a change! instead of ambulance-chasers, and reporting in a professional way on real news and not giving so much play to stories about dumb violent crime and pathetic-ass stupidity.  

"That said," as the cliche goes, we're not ready to abandon the forumla completely:   Chrysler -- the whole freakin company -- is closing down for 2 weeks this July -- a "cost-saving measure" worthy of the Chinese.  And the negotiations in the American Axle strike, which broke down Monday, are back on -- this strike has affected 28 GM plants.  There's a do-over deal in the works for the Michigan democratic primary.  Whosever brilliant idea that was to try and jump the line, THAT person should pay for the primary re-do!  Probably some republican (who can afford it).  And finally, mild weather tonight and over the weekend -- temps in the 40s!  Well damn, let me run right out there and plant a banana.

it's a story about the mayor - why are you standing by the highway?

Breaking news tonight, as reported in the Detroit Free Press -- a very legit and serious story about text messages to/from Christine Beatty and a contractor friend of the mayor, who has made upwards of $45 million in city contracts since Kwame became mayor.  An altogether appropriate lead story.

My question is:  Why is the reporter, Bill Proctor, standing outside in the freezing cold, at 11 o'clock on a Saturday night, in front of the highway somewhere, far from where any city business questionable or otherwise is going down, to report this story??

There was also a "smash and grab" with a stolen Dodge Dakota at a CVS -- that's where they drive a car into a store in order to rob it.  An area of ice twice the size of Britain melted off from Antarctica last year, but morons in Detroit have time for this crap.  Inspired no doubt by the fine example of civic leadership and global awareness they have in both the mayor, and the auto industry.

Speakin of which, UAW/American Axle talks came to nothing today -- 17 more plants are scheduled for partial shutdown Monday.

And a couple of homeowners are putting their pet alligator ("he's part of our family for 15, 16 years now") up on craigslist so they can pay their mortgage, so they won't lose their house.  You won't hear that one on CNBC, as they chronicle what the "haves" call the credit crunch.

For us it may not be so bad after all

Top stories:   Storm track is changing -- For us it may not be so bad after all!  Right now the storm is in Dallas (TX).  Tomorrow afternoon, not much of anything.   There's a winter storm watch from 4 a.m. Saturday till 7 p.m. Sunday.   Snow at its worst by noon Saturday -- 1 to 3 inches at the most.  Looks like Erie PA/Buffalo NY will get the worst of this one.

Horrible car accident in Orchard Lake -- 3 people in the hospital. Shot of wrecked car in the dark, and pavement (bloody?  can't tell -- it's dark)

Wife murderer Stephen Grant appealing his recent conviction -- the indomitable Cheryl Chodun, in white knit hat and shearling jacket, live outside the courthouse (which is closed, of course).

Kwame fighting a recall -- Christine Beatty's lawyer says it is "common" for people to "inadvertently" lie under oath.  Well, glad we got that cleared up!

Gov. Granholm doesn't want MI taxpayers to foot the bill for another presidential primary -- action news reporter Glenda Lewis actually indoors for this story -- "live in the newsroom" at WXYZ studios -- probably right down the hall.  Why can't she be in the same room with the 2 anchors, exactly?

American Axle strike -- Monday GM is going to halt or cut production at 5 more plants.  GM's prayers are being answered.

Sex crimes watch:  three very brief stories, two about adults on trial for molesting children, one about a flasher on the loose in Ann Arbor, targeting sorority houses.

Slaughter in Jerusalem (not enough blood flowing in Detroit, there's always the middle east!)

Explosion in Times Square (or New York!)

cars, crime, and the weather

3/4, top stories:  #1 - It's snowing!!   Winter storm warning still in effect till 7 a.m. -- Wyandotte had thunder along w/ snow tonight.   (the weather)

Peggy Agar out in a parking lot in Allen Park picks up a handful of snow to show you how much has fallen -- Southfield Rd (a major road) is totally clogged w/ snow (that's because they DO NOT PLOUGH out here) -- She talks to someone who saw a car spin out -- "Crews are nowhere near keeping up w/ this storm" -- b/c they don't bother to plough until there's already 4 or 5 inches of snow on the roads.  (cars, the weather)

Live cam on I75 shows the highway completely whited out -- cars going by.

Snow emergency in 8 cities.

#2, the primaries  (doesn't count)

#3, Cheryl Chodun "live outside police headquarters" in downtown Detroit, in the snowstorm at 11 o'clock, talking about stuff that happened this afternoon re: the Tamara Green murder.  Ella Bully Cummings, the reprehensible Detroit police chief, at an outdoor press conference (what, they don't have a room inside police headquarters for this?) being reprehensible.  (crime)

City council puts off the vote on the resolution calling for the mayor to resign  (crime)

The strike at American Axle will shut down a 6th GM plant, in Toledo  (cars)

Back to Peggy Agar, still out in the snow on Southfield Road (which has still not been touched by a plough)  (cars, the weather)

3/3, top stories:  #1 - The rain has changed to snow (yes, this was the top story) -- light snow, in fact -- Radar shows most of the storm has moved out -- "The snow event is over for tonight."  (the weather)

A reporter outside in the dark by an I94 overpass with flooding underneath.  (cars, the weather)

#2, Cheryl Chodun (with no hat!) reporting "live from downtown Detroit" on the renewed investigation into Tamara Greene's death.   She was a stripper murdered in a drive-by shooting, following a party at the Manoogian mansion that Kwame Kilpatrick says never happened.  Now they are saying she was shot with a "police gun."   (violent crime)

#3, City council votes tomorrow on whether Kwame should stay or should he go -- his mother, Rep. Carolyn "Cheeks" Kilpatrick says it's "up to the voters to decide".  (crime)

3/2, top stories:  #1 -  "A terrifying crash involving 5 children" -- 3-car accident caused by driver w/ open alcohol in car.  The reporter was outside, as usual, but for once talking to the "5 children" in question -- all of whom were fine.   (The guy with the open alcohol hit them, then another car; he, his passenger, the other driver in hospital.)   (cars, violence)

#2 - A reporter was outside of some building in downtown Detroit, in the middle of the night, reporting on the Wayne Co sheriff's new initiative to prosecute drug dealers for homicide when people OD.   (crime, drugs)

#3, the weather -- the dreaded "wintry mix" coming / Jerry Hodak (weatherman) informed us the previous night that March would "come in like a weasel."  (the weather)

2 more GM plants about to close as a result of the strike at American Axle -- but they're in Texas and Wisconsin, for a change.  Also, Big 3 to report "dismal" sales tomorrow for the quarter.   (cars)

they're still being pros

I missed the top stories tonight b/c I was watching George Carlin on HBO, who is funnier at age 70 than I ever thought he was back in the day.  I didn't realize how much Lewis Black owes to him.  Or maybe Carlin's been imitating Black lately, I don't know!  But he was very funny.  A little harsh, but funny.

And last night WXYZ was still being professional.  As long as they stay on Kwame Kilpatrick, they do OK.  When that story slows down, though, I promise you they'll be back to house fires and armed robberies and auto industry layoffs and snow.